The Colony/The Advanced Guard
- Sci-Fi Channel, woohoo!
 - City!
 - Traffic!
 - Nakedness!
 - She’s never had popcorn before?
 - Police cars skidding, and cops running up stairs
 - Did the cop have to crash through the window?
 - The cops going down the stairs made it down there before the guy on the fire escape
 - Poof
 - Frozen people, “The reports were accurate” uh, what?
 - “She told us to stay”
 - What, more credits?
 - I’m bored.
 - Just digging around in a corpse
 - Those gloves are monstrously too large
 - And he’s still alive
 - There’s a timeline
 - Just run the damned diagnostic! Christ!
 - (7:08) “I don’t understand your fascination with these things, they’re too hard to work with, they’re too small, and they’re outdated.”
 - Those aren’t real guts
 - That’s probably a green screen
 - Oh, it’s a robot thing, that explains everything
 - Isn’t this the dad from Good Luck Charlie?
 - Charlie is like a bored teenager
 - So they’re all robots
 - (12:48) “This penetration will be like none other”
 - She did her job and brought back the data
 - She laughed, mockingly
 - Yeah, what about the bonus?
 - “18 first penetrations”
 - Worst costumes ever
 - Beamed down!
 - Like rats, they crawl out of the sewer
 - Of course they’re in Los Angeles
 - Yeah, we want non-compliant humans
 - Let’s get drunk!
 - Assaulting the homeless
 - Don’t mistreat the humans! Even though the armada is coming to exterminate the planet
 - Yup, it’s literally “Bar”
 - Oh, it’s that guy!
 - Don’t they want people they can’t control?
 - I don’t know, stuff happens, people taken captive…
 - Doing experiments on the compliant one
 - And now the less compliant one
 - She doesn’t want to hurt people
 - Lecture about doing right
 - No differences in the brains
 - This leader guy is really impatient
 - Back in the cell, that sure is a conveniently huge ventilation passage right there in the cell
 - What do they want from us?
 - This device is actually going to kill them
 - Wow, she is really trying to save their lives
 - Slicing his arm open
 - I get your ruse…
 - The old pocketknife in the door trick
 - Sneaking around the ship
 - Bad stage slap
 - How do you know these things aren’t on our side?
 - Awww
 - Captured again
 - We’re not going to die
 - You want to know about the first time I kissed a gir?
 - Ah, back to the dancing near-naked woman… who is definitely not 13
 - You seriously peed when you saw a naked girl?
 - Are you trying to come on to this girl?
 - Laura is strapped down to a death machine
 - I couldn’t let her die, I just told her about how I peed in the tub!
 - Harper gives them all sorts of information
 - This plan seems extremely risky
 - Harper kisses Kevin
 - And back to mostly naked woman with a dude
 - Kevin lets Desmond out
 - Escape detected
 - Fred wants to take them back
 - Are you annihilating them or taking them as slaves?
 - Love is the factor?
 - They figured out how the control works/doesn’t work
 - Fight with Charlie
 - Run into Bravo
 - Shoot Bravo
 - Hacker fight!
 - Kill the bad aliens
 - Why does she keep kissing him?
 - Alpha is dead
 - Desmond fights Bravo again, and wins, I guess
 - Laura is back
 - Well, this is awkward
 - Worst spaceship explosion ever
 - I guess we’re all friends now
 
Calling this The Colony makes no sense
