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Matango (Attack of the Mushroom People)
- Meanwhile, in this fake city
- I do think you’re insane
- Meanwhile, on this boat where they’re playing big band music
- Tokyo is horrible!
- I lost 20 years of work on that manuscript!
- Meanwhile, on this green-screened boat…
- This lady is going to be sick
- No one actually wears a captain’s outfit like that
- I don’t feel sick, I AM sick
- Are they all wearing these medallions?
- Playing the uke
- Alright, so now there’s uke music, but no one is playing?
- This is how Gilligan’s Island starts…
- Pretty girl is pretty
- She is Mami
- This is the story of the Aho Mori and its fateful journey…
- Kampai!
- We’re different from the general run of people
- I’m the skipper, hahaha
- Meanwhile, on this green-screened boat…
- This weather looks bad, we should turn back
- Confidence is very important!
- The women will be just fine surrounded by all these horny chauvinists
- Look, clouds!
- Yes, the best place for everyone in a storm is on deck, except for the women
- This boat cost $40k
- We should turn back because this lady is sick, not because of the outrageous storm
- I know we’re in the middle of a life-threatening storm, but can we talk about the psychology of women right now?
- How dare you comfort that woman when we’re making the boat not sink!
- Radio breaks
- Water splashes on that woman
- Meanwhile, on this model of a boat
- The mast breaks
- The radio is smashed, the mast is broken, the engine is busted, but we should be cool
- This buffoon caught in the ropes
- Should someone be on the rudder or…?
- Later, after the storm passes…
- I told you we wouldn’t sink!
- It’s strange that we’re all dry, isn’t it?
- I’m pretty sure no one is searching for you guys
- Are we drifting? Yeah, probably, since no one has been on the rudder all night.
- Where are we now? In the water.
- You had to play skipper!
- The good news is, we have books and terrible music, and a stuffed monkey
- The news is so slow, the biggest story on the radio is that this boat is missing
- The battery in the radio lasted exactly 32 seconds
- Something coming out of the mist
- It’s probably fine if you just tell the giant boat to look out
- Luckily, this guy was hallucinating
- Your head feels funny because you’re smoking the funny cigarettes
- Shut up with your stupid lady laughing!
- Women are bad luck on boats because men lose their heads…
- Island ho!
- I’m pretty sure that’s not Japan, idiot
- Hey, for fun, why don’t we all crawl around in the sand on this beach… for fun…
- I’m just going to touch all these plants as I walk so they know I’m friendly
- Did you know maraschino cherries grow on bushes? *man hisses like a cat*
- We’re going… that way!
- You hear water?
- Sweet sweet water…
- Someone arranged those rocks! But let’s keep drinking this sweet sweet water
- Should we go back? Nah, let’s follow this trail
- We should cross the island because maybe houses
- Are we going up there? The answer is yes. Always yes.
- Shipwreck!
- Sliding awkwardly down this mountain of dirt
- Running on the beach for no reason at all
- We all knew it was a wreck, Captain Obvious
- We’re going onboard, aren’t we…
- What a disgusting sight…
- Investigating the wreck
- That fall on the stairs desperately needed a slide whistle or wa-wa trombone
- It’s fungus!
- It’s weird. We are all in agreement on that, captain
- It’s thick with fungus!
- No food, surprising no one
- This was a research ship?
- The mold here is a different color, which means…
- A turtle with no eyes, obviously the cause of mutation from radiation
- Chemical stop the growth of the fungus…we should probably note that for later
- We could scrub the cabin with chemicals and live here
- A giant mushroom in a box
- Note, “Matango” on the mushroom box
- All the mirrors were removed, probably because they lost all their combs
- The captain’s cabin is….bathed in red light!
- I don’t know what’s happening in the captain’s cabin, but I’m going in!
- That guy in the hold eating SPAM
- I guess rationing isn’t a thing
- This seems…weird
- The country of origin is concealed, and the equipment is from all over
- Polishing a rifle
- This rifle will come in handle for shooting things
- Log book says the island is deserted and has no food
- Do not touch the mushrooms!
- Mushrooms affect the nervous system
- No one who left looking for food returned
- Maybe they disappeared because of the mushrooms that are everywhere, except we never found any on the way to this wreck
- “A house on land” is a house
- Women fetch the water, men hunt
- Seeing things in the flames…
- Meanwhile, singing in a club
- “I hire people to think for me, and then I take their thoughts.”
- Yeah, novelists do steal ideas too…
- The medallion ceremony is a big deal, now you’re part of our cult
- Cancer stick?
- I think I found the broken mirrors! Dun dun dunnnn
- Seagull, kill the sky-rat!
- Other ships wrecked on the island
- Scenes of women struggling to carry heavy water jugs
- A gentleman, helping with the water jugs
- Mushrooms!
- Walking mushroom!
- Shoot first
- Yes, we just imagined the giant walking penis… that’s the better of the possibilities
- Bunking in the old wreck, I guess…
- This guy always puts on his sunglasses when he gets sneaky
- Just in case someone shines a flashlight in his face?
- Something creeping around on the boat
- The women set up a trap
- The women walking around wearing sheets
- Stealing food
- Attacked by the mushroom person
- Yell louder so they can’t hear us!
- Mmmm… squishy
- Hideous…ghost?
- At least they haven’t lost their appetites
- It’s the women causing this madness!
- Bringing a knife to a gun fight
- “I used you to get to Europe, you’ve always been repulsive to me”
- Footprints in the sand
- Inspirational speech
- The women are doing a lot of work
- Looking in the sand for food
- Ah, turtle eggs
- Playing with chemicals
- Drinking chemicals
- The author is going after whatever got on the ship last night
- Sunglasses guy finds more eggs
- Author goes hunting
- The women, working hard
- The man is like, “whatevs”
- “You pretended to my friend, but you always treated me like a dog!”
- The author comes back and everyone knows he ate the mushrooms
- Buying eggs
- Sunglasses will happily kill everybody to get off the island
- The author starts making out with the singer
- She’s so happy everyone wants her
- The author ate mushrooms, now he’s mad
- Blah blah blah I’m nuts
- Wrestle the gun away
- Later, trying to repair the yacht
- That guy suggests to the skipper that they go off on their own
- Society breaks down
- Crazy author gets out with the help of Mami, takes Akiko, then shoots Sunglasses
- Wasting more ammo
- Money, strewn around the body of Sunglasses
- In the mushroom garden, mushrooms are growing fast
- Mami is back on the ship
- Now you finally know what it means to ask for help from a woman
- Mushrooms are laughing
- Nom nom mushrooms
- Hallucinating dancing girls
- Still seeing dancing girls…
- Laughing everywhere!
- Popup mushroom people!
- He gives up
- Stop crying, woman
- Story of the castaways and how they all died, though they haven’t died yet
- Just cross that out…
- I found these fingers…
- Finger potatoes, that is…
- Can we eat the mushrooms now?
- This is a horribly awkward confession of love while she talks about suicide
- Shooting first, again
- Thankfully, this gun has infinite ammunition
- The mushroom people are breaking in everywhere
- Is this your arm?
- Sneak attack!
- Laundry attack!
- Kidnap the female!
- Sneak attack! Struggle…shove
- Stupid fairies!
- Surrounded by penises!
- Tetsuo! Keneda!
- These mushrooms are delicious!
- He grabs her anyway…
- This rifle is still shootings
- Groped by all the penises
- And now you know what it’s like!
- He escapes and goes out to the yacht
- Might as well sail away now
- Back at this wacky city
- He’s behind bars like a zoo animal with doctors looking in on him
- Crash zoom!
- Oh, he did eat the mushrooms
- Stupid Tokyo!
