Episode 48: Sam’s Notes

Prophecy of Eve

  • Present day canned thunder sounds
  • Angel City is besieged by demons
  • Narrated exposition
  • Canned thunder sound
  • Flashback to “the beginning”
  • Dance for me!
  • Father is not at all freaked out by telekinesis
  • He always takes his daughter on dangerous jobs
  • I guess it’s good it’s  not a hot day
  • Frickin dog tags
  • Fuck locks
  • Hulk smash!
  • Demon burn!
  • She looks very determined, she has determined face
  • Symbol recurrence
  • It’ll be great when she grows into this leather duster
  • Hanging out by this car, in the rain
  • Secret dojo!
  • Drums!
  • Sparks!
  • Flipping!
  • Mutual destruction!
  • I have a message inexplicably written on a scroll
  • Have you heard of children?
  • Of course it’s forbidden
  • Dayum
  • Don’t assign the n00b to the team!
  • Yup, still in Angel City
  • Livecorp? Really?
  • Thank goodness they have their logo on their CLIs
  • I assume these are evil cells, because Livecorp
  • Just people walking around the streets with swords, it’s cool
  • This fight is 90% motion blur
  • Matrix come hither
  • I guess she could just get out on her own
  • 15 years killing demons, never heard of the order
  • It’s 2am, who’s buying dinner?
  • “How many stiffs we got” “the only one that counts is the one in my pants”
  • Cops smoke
  • Yes, how do you figure they were protecting the dumpster?
  • So… pistol? Oh… sword! Right, that’s what I was thinking…
  • Instead of looking at spatter patterns, you could look at how all the perps have swords.
  • Eve eats like a savage
  • Oh, it’s okay, we’re too busy watching you savaging your food
  • You all have cheap mall-stamped dog tags as well?
  • So, you’re with The Order, then…
  • It’s been 15 years and they’re still looking for a girl that slaughters demons in your own city?
  • Two weeks later…
  • Is Twin Peaks a strip club?
  • Let’s bring everything to a screeching halt for Politically Speaking exposition
  • I’ll sell you my vote for another Sex on the Beach
  • This is why pick-up lines suck
  • This guy is making progress with this woman and I think she is about to ruin him
  • Wow, I want to learn more about this Adopt a Monkey program
  • This is how we try to make new demons and fail
  • He was just around the block, where were you looking?
  • The evil guy is pretty much the only white guy in this movie
  • Zach witnesses all the motion blur
  • So Zach just taps into demon radio
  • Finally, more politics!
  • Hey look, more Livecorp
  • This governor person is a good man, so this is obviously going to go badly for him
  • So being on the streets for 15 years, where did Eve get her training?
  • Cheater!
  • So… they’re Jedi now?
  • Do not stray to the dark side
  • Hah! You totally failed
  • “Expect a warm welcome” she says, menacingly
  • Now, over to the crime lab
  • This cop is supposed to be Ice-T
  • Do secret orders always wear their secret symbols around everywhere?
  • Those are some sweet ink sleeves…
  • Don’t point that thing at me!
  • It’s been 15 years and none of these people searching for Eve have aged
  • You’re not being convincing, try a pickup line maybe?
  • So these red eye people aren’t really demons, just, hypnotized
  • You stay in cover… here, on the couch.
  • The Order has bingo?
  • What is the governor even running for?
  • The demon order of blah blah blah want you to be president…
  • Fake news?
  • Stained glass alludes to a special child
  • Is it LIFE Corp, or LIVE Corp?
  • This isn’t really that incomprehensible
  • Take the syringe from the satin lined case
  • Injecting into the skull seems unnecessary if this toxin is a gas
  • There are a billion cameras in this exam room
  • We’re just going to wipe the hard drives?
  • At least I don’t have to answer whether I trust Eve because someone else’s ringing phone interrupted us
  • Is this cop really Officer Black?
  • Why did we have to show this guy winning a stuffed bear at bingo?
  • Are governors allowed to give rewards for extra-judicial murders?
  • But you failed to find her in 15 years so… you kinda suck
  • Test her in battle, but don’t
  • Why would a sniper want a flashlight on his rifle?
  • Cuddling with the bear
  • Sister Mary is my favorite character
  • Your solution to the problem is to throw chairs?
  • Huh?
  • What the?
  • Huh?
  • Mid-credits: Mom still hasn’t found Eve and also hasn’t aged